According to sex relationship columnist Dr. Gabrielle Morrissey, “Great sex starts in the mind. Turning on your brain hours or days before you have sex triggers your libido into action.”
Studies have show that women need a transition time of approximately 10 to 30 minutes between activities, so turning off the television and taking time to turn on the mind is necessary. Here’s how to get this process started simply. Women should take a bath, do some selfish pampering, and a loving foot massage never hurts. Sexual research in Japan suggests that scent is a factor too, so having smells like sandalwood, chamomile, lavender, jasmine or even lemon, maybe a good idea. Also remember, a little chocolate seems to stimulate the sexual desire in most women, this has research to back it up as well.
“Women access different parts of the brains for multitasking, whereas men generally focus on one thing before moving on to the next. Your brain will focus on any pleasure that is occurring and increase blood flow to the area. Even if it’s just a quickie and you don’t orgasm, sex bio-chemically releases endorphins, the chemicals that get us revved up and make us want to have more sex, more often.”
So in simplest terms, a woman needs to think her way into sexual encounters by doing everything possible to focus her attention, so the body and mind get ready to have sex. This has been known for centuries, which is how the practice of Tantric sex evolved in the Eastern world.
The Example of Tantric Sex
Tantric sex practice is a philosophy of life, one that transcends the bedroom, allowing the physical senses to be divinely inspired in all aspects of living a holistic path. When practiced with a sense of personal awareness, Tantric sex can be a gateway to both sensual pleasure and spiritual transcendence. In the Tantric traditions, sexual intercourse and orgasmic sensations combine together producing profound spiritual experiences at these peaks. Tantric sex is seen as a living embodiment of the male energy from Shiva and the feminine energy of Shakti, coming together as one united being sexually. In such sexual unions, it is believed that human beings can attain the highest states of enlightenment, healing and ecstasy.
People who practice Tantra and have devoted themselves to the Tantric sex are called Tantrikas. The are individuals attempting to learn all the components of Tantra, so that they can focus their sexual energies without judgement and for the purposes of healing, love and spiritual empowerment. Tantrikas effectively become the living embodiment of gods or goddesses, as their bodies are transformed into male and females temples, representing the sacred divinity of their sexuality. Tantrikas are considered to be practitioners of an occult science and masters of the martial arts, just as religious devotees, monks or priests. Both men and women can practice Tantra, although the term Tantrika is more often associated with women.
In Tantra, when the masculine and feminine merge in their sacred divinity, new dimensions of awareness become available. When the sacredness of sexual unity is felt and fully achieved, it is possible to experience a connection to all the energies of the human life force itself. Being in tune with what many call the source of creation. This connection uplifts human consciousness , well beyond the physical and into greater fields of power and energy. There, the mind is removed from the body in the immediate sense, as all things become attuned to an unfamiliar sensation. This is the mind experiencing an absolute state of knowing, comprehension and acceptance. Tantric practitioners believe, this is when individuals can begin to feel linked through their sexual partner to every living thing in the universe. This feeling is the mind experiencing universal love.
Essentially, this being in your heart and being present in your mind, at all times. During sexual activities, it also means being aware of the positive and erotic energies inside your, transforming the blissful feelings of the physical into a mentally orgasmic state of being. Initially, Tantrikas experience this form of orgasm after prolonged Tantric sex, but with practice, they learn to bring themselves to this state naturally. This is done by calming the body and focusing the mind. No physical touching is necessary nor ejaculation, this type of orgasmic experience is known and referred to as thinking off.
Tantrikas spend many years or a lifetime engaged in the study of yoga and meditation to master their bodies and minds. These practices awaken inner psychic energies and higher states of consciousness. Through following the path of sacred love, they seek to merge and immerse themselves in the dual nature and sexualities, bringing them together with erotic sexual union.
Making Love With Your Mind.
Of course tantric sex sounds wonderful, but can’t a deeper and more pleasurable connection be achieved between yourself and your partner without spending years studying ancient traditions like Tantra? The answer is obviously, yes.
Want to know the real secret to a new and invigorating sex life? It’s all about your mind. For men, this often isn’t a problem, they just want ot have sex. But for women, getting in the mood can take more effort. Having sex can be like going to the gym. Your mind and body wants to rebel at times, but once you’re doing it. It feels fantastic and there is a reasoning behind this, because the secret to good sex is in your mind.
“Use your mind to trigger real desire for your partner.” Dr Morrissey recommends, “Sit across from each other, hold hands and stare into each other’s eyes. Without speaking, start to remember the last time you made love and really enjoyed it. This exercise really makes the most of the mind body connection, as you’re calling on a real experience, so your body will remember the feelings and sensation.”
Learning to let your mind feel at ease, so that your partner can be your fantasy takes some work, at first. But as it becomes more natural, the sexual tensions will ease away and soon it will become an state of naturally occurring bliss.
You just have to say three little words. Yes, yes, yes…
image source – matthiastobias.com